#PrayersforJennyNicole

  Ive mentioned in one of my post about my best friend Jenny who has been diagnosed with thyroid cancer last month and recently had surgery to remove her thyroid completely. 

Well, last week she began radioactive iodine, which is basically raidation & today she is having a full body scan to see if the cancer is gone and did not spread anywhere else in her body.

I'm just asking everyone to please pray for Jenny today. She's having a hard time grabbing a hold of everything. It has hit everyone hard & fast. 

 

Thanks xoxo

Waffle House post

Sitting here at Waffle House till it's time for me to head to work. I have to visit my Momma :)

 I'm really procrastinating today!

Set my alarm to 10am 

Probably hit the snooze button 8 times

Mornings are so rough for me.

Today I have to do so much laundry! 

Billy's laundry piles up so quick it's ridiculous. Sometimes I think these nurses just throw clean towels or clothes in the dirty laundry just because. 

At Billy's apartment complex they have quarter washers & dryers. 

So were spending 20 dollars every week. it's a bit crazy.

really can't wait to we get a place together. 

i want it to happen right this second but, there is a lot of things we have to get together first.

 Jeez Louise!!

\

 My eye is absolutely killing me today. 

Yesterday i got into a fight with my mascara & the brush stabbed me in my eye.

All yesterday i thought it was an eyelash or something. 

This morning woke up and its still there. 

so i investigated 

My eye ball is scratched. 

Love is in the Air....

Valentine's Day really didn't go as i planned. 

Yesterday i worked basically 3 shifts. the aide for one of my clients called off and i bet you can guess who took her place? ME, so i worked her shift, my shift, & was called into my mother's work to help them out with their Valentine's Day dinner and i don't even work there.  Let me explain, My Mom works as a waitress at Waffle House. Past 3 years on Valentine's Day they fancy up the restaurant and people make reservations for a special dinner. it's pretty nice!

Well, they were short on help, so the manager said "Wilma, Call your daughter were desperate" a ring a ding ding and i was in. Working there last night really made me realize how much i miss waitressing. 

A Couple years ago i worked at a Italian Restaurant, I Loved it. But, I was suffering horribly with my panic attacks and anxiety. 

A Lot of people don't understand that Panic Attacks just pop up out of nowhere, you could be in the happiest mood and then you feel like you have been hit by a semi. Don't get me wrong some panic attacks do come on if you over think things or if you are stressed out. While waiting on customers i would  get the worst attacks and they would come out of the blue, 3 or 4 times a night. Never did i panic at that job, i never felt overwhelmed. I Loved it. I had my regular customers everyday.  After 6 months i had to quit that job, I just couldn't bare that feeling every night. 

So it was amazing working last night at Waffle House, I made my mom proud. They call me "Little Wilma" :) This is probably the only time anybody will ever here me say this but, I am just like my mother.

Ekkk that's scaryyy

At the end of the night, i was happy i made some money but I didn't get to spend the whole day with My Valentine but we'll make up for that :)

    

Love You both very much!

Sitting here watching Ellen.
Billy is snoring right beside me.
& I'm waiting for this snow storm to hit
I'm so excited!!

Yes I said excited. I love getting snow storms, i just hate driving in it & having to clean off my car.
  The wind is starting to pick up & it's getting darker. ekkkk :) the weather guy said Columbus could get 4 to 6 & north of Columbus 6 to 10. Hopefully that 6 to 10 comes down into the Columbus area. Meteorologist never really seem to get the weather right 70% of the time. My luck this whole storm will miss us. (knock on wood)
 Enough talking about the snow.

 Billy just woke up and mentioned he was a little cold, there was cold air coming out of the vents, what the heck! went to check the thermostat & its 63 degrees with the AC on. the only people that could have done it is the nurse or the other aide. Freaking go outside if your hot. It's 23 degrees out. They just think about themselves & never about Billy their CLIENT who can't regulate his body temperature. URGHHH

  Lately, I've been trying to figure out some relaxing techniques to just calm my body & not be so tensed up.

I worry constantly about things. Past couple weeks just haven't been good on me physically and mentally. I've had a lot of anger built up, every little things aggravates me. it scares me and i question myself, Am I Bipolar? God, I really hope not.
  January 21st, my best friend, whose been my best friend since 2nd grade was diagnosed with Thyroid Cancer. Right away they had to schedule surgery to remove her Thyroids. Now, she is on a no iodine diet till towards the end of this month.
Losing my Poppy is still very fresh for me, even though its been a year an a half since his passing, I'm just not ready for something like this again in my life. No, she isn't going to die. But, cancer isn't a easy thing no matter the type or stage or who has it. it affects everyone not just that person. Since her diagnoses it seems like its all she can really talk about and its understandable, but too be honest its really getting to me. I want to be supportive and be there for her every step of the way, but what do i do when it starts to bring me down and bring back memories with what my Grandpa had to go through and when i had cancer as a kid?

 NO MATTER what I'm still going to be by her side. I just need help on trying to get me to relax and not tense up through all this that is going on. am' I making sense?

I LOVE YOU JENNY BOO! You are a fighter <3

Michigan week, Signs from heaven, SNOW!!!

 
                                            It's officially Michigan week here in CBUS.

  For those of you who aren't football shabby.
One of the BIGGEST college football rivalries is against THE Ohio State & Michigan. This Saturday will be the day my boys will BEAT down those Wolverines, once again!

Sorry i'm not sorry if you're a Wolverine.

Football is the one thing I love about this time of year. Yeah, I don't know a lot of the things that happen during a game, But I know more than I knew 3 years ago.

Billy is a maniac over football so I'm kind of bound to watch it with him. Which I have no problem with now a days. Did I just admit that? What's the world coming too? :)

Since Billy lives like 3 minutes away from the horse shoe stadium. It's pretty amazing seeing everyone representing the Buckeyes come game day. Really, it's like that all year around here. What can we say we are proud.
Every year the students have this tradition before the BIG game. There is a little pond on campus they call Mirror Lake, it's not a lake so I have no clue how they came about naming it, when it's clearly a pond.
 But, Anyways the students jump in the pond & just go crazy. Need I remind you, here in Ohio it's freezing this time of year. The student go all out though, girls wearing bikini's, guys just wearing shorts. IT'S JUST CRAZY!  It's a pretty big thing here but this year they are cracking down & whoever wants to attend the jump needs wristband. you can't even just watch. pretty ridiculous but things have to be done.

      Just looked out my window an it's a winter wonderland outside!!!!
      This girl is definitely happy.
       I love the SNOW!
CBUS is under a winter weather watch until Wednesday around 10am.
All I'm asking this year is that we have a white Christmas.

  One year when I was little, It's was Christmas Morning. My Sister & I woke up all excited for presents, you know typical kids. But, the first thing I noticed was the snow outside. I could careless about the gifts. it was funny.
  That snow fall was a surprise for everyone, no one was expecting it.

So, do you ever wonder how you'll know if your love ones from heaven is sending you signs??
Lately, I've been finding a lot of pennies heads up. I'm superstitious when it comes to different things. Picking up a penny heads up is one of them. I believe picking a penny heads up is good luck and if you pick up a penny tails up, it'll bring bad luck.

 Since my Grandfather passed away., I don't believe I've ever seen a penny tails up. Everytime is see a penny heads up I'll keep it. I feel it's a sign from my Poppy, him letting me know he's with me. 

Poppy kept all kinds of coins. He was a true believer in saving change.  I mean you see! Could this be a sign from him? I don't know I strongly feel it could be. I need Teresa Caputo :) 

Well I'm heading to bed. 

If I don't blog before Thanksgiving, Everyone have a safe & happy Thanksgiving :) xoxo

GO BUCKS!!!

Random

It's 4:15am & I'm wide awake! 

Billy & I fell asleep after attending a friend of our's going away party. I think we took give or take about a 3 hour nap. I don't remember what time we crashed. Lol you would think we were drunk or something. Definitely not! 

 So I just finished watching this movie called "The Way Way Back" it's pretty much an all-star cast, Steve Carell, Toni Collette, Maya Rudolph, etc etc. it was really good. it's basically telling us to stand our grounds in all situations, don't let no one tell you how to live your life or change you from who you really are. 

Get some backbones! 

I guess I should just go to bed. ;)

Goodnight Loves

 

http://youtu.be/W-TE_Ys4iwM

"Do not weep at my grave. I'am not there. I ride the wind and walk among the clouds. My pain is gone and replaced with wings. I am with my God and no greater joy is there. Do not weep for what I was. Rejoice at what I have become."

  On this day a year ago at 12:24pm i lost the GREATEST man i known, My Poppy (Grandfather).
It's been a year??
why does it feel like it was just yesterday?

Everyday i still grieve my Grandfather's passing, it just doesn't feel real to me yet. Is that weird? i mean, it goes from spending 24/7 with him, to not seeing him or able to talk to him at all. I remember every single bit of the day he passed.

 Hospice care just arrived at my Grandparent's house. My family was all together & we were all there with Poppy except Daisy, their dog. Poppy was never too fine about having a dog, it just wasn't his thing but my Aunts talked him into it and Daisy absolutely adored Poppy. We knew Poppy loved Daisy, he just didn't want anybody to know. :) We weren't stupid! Anyways,  Daisy was in the backyard and she knew something was going on. So, I decided to let her in. Daisy ran in & went straight to Poppy's bedside, I went over to Poppy and i told him that Daisy was laying right beside him. Poppy then looked at me and just did something weird, i freaked out kinda and got the nurse. Next thing i knew he was gone! I was in a shocked kind of stage at first, but when he passed we all sort of felt relief because we knew he wasn't in pain anymore. I go outside to get some air, come back in the house, look at Poppy and my eyes become a waterfall.

 Millions of things were going through my mind. That can't be my Grandpa! He's suppose to walk me down the aisle at my wedding, see my children... Went over to the bedside where my Grandpa was laying, knelt down, grabbed his cold hand, and just talked to him. I couldn't stop crying nor could i leave him. Then, the funeral home came and i had to leave him. I followed them as they took my Grandpa's body out of the house, into the car and just sat on the steps and watched the van with Poppy's body drive down the street until the car disappeared. More tears just began to run down my face.

  To be honest... I don't know how I can get over his death. So much pain lays inside of me.
I always wonder if he's looking down on me or if i'm making him proud.

   One thing i always tell myself is that he's in heaven & isn't suffering anymore. I need to quit being stubborn. God needed a angel & He wanted Poppy. Poppy will forever be my Guardian Angel.<3

    Poppy, I Love You & Miss You so very much! Rest in Heaven <3